Sick / All the time

New poem. Not my best, but I like it nevertheless.

Sick / All the time

Sick of the emptiness,

Of the millions of burnt out stars

That we don’t even know

Lost their light

Hundreds or thousands of years ago.

Sick of the darkness

That we don’t even know

Envelopes us,

Even now.

Sick of the dead gazes

From eyes that have lost so much

That we don’t even know,

As we peer into the mirror,

Are our own.

So tuck me into bed tonight,

And let me sleep forever,

Because I don’t wanna live in a world

Where everything doesn’t sparkle

All the time.

And love never stops

Filling you to the brim

Till your face hurts

From smiling

All the time.

And life is just

One enormous embrace

That never feels like

You’re suffocating;

Just warmth

All the time.

MW 2010

Don't fix it if ain't broke

The ordeal I just went through with my computer is one of those major face to palm moments.

To give a little background, my computer hadn't been wanting to connect to the internet here at the house, and I haven't been able to get anywhere with WiFi, to test if it was a hardware problem with the ethernet cable, or a software problem.

A few days a go, our friend Bill took my laptop apart looking to see if he could find a hardware problem. After about an hour of looking, he couldn't figure it out, so he put it back together and we left it alone for awhile.

Tonight, our friend Harvard came over, and spent at least two hours, if not more, looking for a problem with both the hardware and the software. He attempted a system restore... and accidentally deleted every single thing I had ever downloaded or uploaded to this computer. No, I wasn't mad (after all, he was just trying to help me), but I have to say, it was frustrating. Travis and I lost a couple of good scripts we were working on.

About twenty or thirty minutes ago, I walked over to it to see if there was any other possible solution. I looked at the ethernet jack. Without thinking much about it, I blew in it to clear the dust, and plugged the cable back in.

And wouldn't you know, it worked.

Moral of the story: Don't fix it if it ain't broke. Or, keep your electronics clean.

Starving Artists

Well, I asked Travis if I could jump on the computer to blog, and now that I have, I don't really know what to say. Especially since not a lot of people, if any, actually read this.

I do have to say Infamous is rockin' and rollin' - we have the pilot episode up, and it has been well received. On top of that, Travis and I got accepted into the company of Sculpted Entertainment, and that will be quite fun, plus a source of income, once we get started with it (sometime next month I think).

Also, I finally wrote a little something that could turn into a big something, and it's looking pretty good. I just need to figure out what happens.

In the meantime, though, it seems money is tight and we've got to watch ourselves on creature comforts... Travis, John, and I can all be a little extravagant sometimes. :-/ Oh so Boho, no? :-P

I guess I've nothing to complain about; I'm living my dream. And besides the dark depressions I can slip into at a moment's notice (which is no different from any other time in my life), I'm quite happy. Really. And this is good.

Mardi Gras and other things

I went to my first Mardi Gras parade ever today. Apparently, it was the "family friendly" version of Mardi Gras - all you had to do to get beads was wave, not flash your tits. So, of course, I got lots of 'em. And there was zero alcohol. Oh well, next year, perhaps? (Not that I want to flash the world, I just want to party like there's no tomorrow with OTHER people that are partying like there's no tomorrow. ^.^) We bought a King Cake, though, which is a Mardi Gras tradition I'd never heard of till today. Effing DELICIOUS, though. Seriously. We need to introduce this to Texas.

As for it being Valentine's Day, not much happened there. Travis and I are both broke, and we cuddle and be cute every day anyway, so...

Infamous, however, is rolling. We are to premiere this week. Exciting!

And we're headed back to Denton on Wednesday to promote Infamous at Thin Line Film Festival. This is very cool, but we'll only be there till Thursday, so I'm quite sad that I won't get to spend any time with family and friends. Strictly business. If only Travis and I didn't have that audition on Friday... *sigh* I do miss everyone.

Oh well, just keep truckin'. :-)

WHO 'DAT?

GEAUX SAINTS!

Yep, I moved to the right state. :-P

Living just a little bit

Well, I'm sorry for having neglected the blog so long. I've either been too busy, too tired, or too damn sick of sitting in front of the computer to blog. But now I'm here, never fear. :-)

Living here at John's has been a pretty sweet deal, to be sure. I've got everything I need and more. John is a total saint. Speaking of Saints, I should be watching the Super Bowl right now, buuuut... I'm not. Go Saints, though!

Travis and I have been working pretty hard on Infamous. I've been assigned the job of heading up Marketing and Promotions, which is fairly scary, since I have never done marketing before and I have absolutely no clue as to how to go about it. The boys have been saying I'm doing a good job, though, so I've got that going for me. :-) Also, Travis is going to make his first appearance in Episode 4, and - hopefully - I get to make my first appearance in Episode 5. However, this information is not set in stone just yet, so we'll see. One thing IS for sure though - we will both be in it. Yay!

In the meantime, working crew on set has been satisfying enough. I ran the slate last shooting day, and will probably continue to do so. It's quite exciting just to work on my first film gig and work with such talented people. Also, I may be a back-up makeup artist, as our primary makeup artist, Liz, is also a major character in the series.

My emotions have been swinging every which-a-way, though, which is another reason I've held off on blogging. Sometimes I get all freaked about being here and I don't want to blog when I'm in such a state, because honestly, it's not bad here at all. I can just get into such a foul mood. However, I expected this - I've never been a big fan of change, so I knew I would go through some growing pains after about a week out here. Really though, it's super awesome!

I do miss my home, but not so terribly. I feel fairly well-accepted here (a problem I had when I moved to Denison - I felt like such an outcast there), and in my element for the most part. And Travis and John are wonderful people to have around.

In other news, I am, for the millionth time, getting obsessed with Paganism, the occult, the paranormal, Voodoo (I AM living in Louisiana, after all), and all things mystical. This is a fact about myself that I tend to get really embarrassed about, since I don't like to come across as some whacked-out kook, but hell, it's interesting stuff. You don't have to believe in it (and a lot of times, I find stuff that I call out as bullshit myself), but it's cool to read up on.

Okay, 'assit for now. Later kids.

Made It

Before I say anything else, let it be known that I have the sweetest boyfriend in all of the universe. He just brought me pizza and a margarita. :-)

Travis and I loaded our stuff into the U-Haul yesterday, and man, we have a ton of shit. A ton. We packed an entire 17-foot truck to the max. I blame it mostly on Travis - but then, he was the one with the couch and the bed. And more movies than I can count. And a bunch of records. And I don't even know what all. We were afraid my stuff wouldn't fit after we loaded his, because it took up most of the space.

Well, after we did our loading, we said our goodbyes, and then headed out. Driving through Dallas, I nearly had a heart attack, because at one point, we had an 18-wheeler on one side of us, a concrete wall on the other, and an 18-wheeler in front of us. Despite my sleep deprivation, I was wide awake with terror until we made it out onto I-20. Then finally, I fell asleep for a little bit.

When I awoke, Travis and I began to talk, and we had an absolutely wonderful long conversation that reminded me why I feel just fine with the idea of being 175 miles away from home with just him and my own self to rely on.

Then... we were here. We pulled up in front of John's house and honked the horn. He came out and hugged us, and suddenly, somehow, we live here now. It's crazy.

I slept for most of today, but Travis dived headlong into this new web series that he and John and Greg and Harvard are working on called Infamous. Supposedly, I should be working on it later, and in the meantime, John has given me the task of promoting it around the internet, which I am doing so even now. (As in - go check it out on Facebook. Website up soon!)

We unloaded most of our stuff this evening, and it's a lot of stuff to maneuver. I guess we'll figure it out.

But man, we're here. We're living the dream!

The Day of the Move

I have been awake all night long packing my stuff, as I am the master procrastinator. I am so exhausted I can barely move. If I can just get through loading the U-Haul, I can doze on the way there. I am officially too tired to care about sentimentality right now.

On a side note, I have now looked into the depths of hell itself. It's in my closet.

Well, I have to go finish this moving thing. Next time I post, I should be in Shreveport. :-)

Random people are the best.

So, like I mentioned in my last entry, I went and checked out this new 24 hour coffee shop. I walked in and managed to strike up a conversation with the barista, and eventually a friend of his who was doing homework there wandered over and joined in. This was a little after 4 - I finally left at 7.

Ack, my cat is trying to lick my hands while I type.

Anyway, I guess I'm just excited (and a little sad about the bad timing) that I'm meeting all of these random cool people, drinking coffee, and having wonderful conversation. Mix that in with working on my art and getting to see all of my close friends before I go... well, I'm just so happy that I'm having a fantastic last week here in town before I'm off on an exciting new adventure.

Everything is just going rather well. I hope there's no "other shoe" involved here; in fact, I kind of feel like this IS the other shoe, after a rough patch of depression.

The only downside is that now my sleep schedule is totally out of whack and I don't even want to go to sleep because I have so much stuff I want and/or need to do.

Oh well. Can't have everything, I guess. :-)

Laundry marathon.

I don't think I've ever done this much laundry in one week.

Five days till the big move. Well, since it's in the wee hours of tomorrow already, I guess you could say four.

Last night I went to the Square to drink up the scenery (and some good Jupiter House coffee) before I left. I met up with two very interesting individuals and had a great conversation for a large portion of the night. I also made a few last-minute purchases at Recycled Books: Letters to a Young Artist and Ghosts & Vampires in New Orleans, plus a Recycled Books hoodie that I have wanted for years so that I may remember the best used bookstore in the world whilst I am gone. (And how many of them are painted purple and reside in an old opera house?)

Then, I headed over to Bryan and Kevin's apartment with Travis. Kevin was asleep, but Jared, Jeremy, and a guy named John whom I have met on a couple of occasions were there. We had nice time just hanging out.

Apparently, tomorrow we're having a going away party at our friend Evan's house. That should be fun, and kind of sad I guess, too.

Well, I may head over to Big Mike's Coffee Shop, a relatively new coffee shop in Denton that is supposedly open 24 hours. As it is now four in the morning, I don't seem to have much else to do, and now is a good time to investigate this supposed 24 hours thing.

Guess that's it for the time being. <3